Joshua and Rebekah Weigel are award-winning filmmakers in Los Angeles dedicated to making movies that inspire as well as entertain. I'd never met them, but after they saw one of my videos, they were inspired to write a fictional screenplay with me in mind as the main character. As they were writing this script, the Weigels were trying to contact me through various channels, but since I was gadding about on a speaking tour, they couldn't reach me. Then one Sunday while they were attending church in Westlake Village, they ran into an old friend of theirs named Kyle.
"What are you doing now?" they asked Kyle.
"I'm working as a caregiver for this guy named Nick Vujicic." he said.
Not surprisingly, Joshua and Rebekah were stunned.
How amazing is that? How often does it happen that two dedicated filmmakers write a script for someone they've never met, then seek him out and offer to make a movie with him? It's fantastic, right? A dream come true!
Have you ever missed out on a wonderful chance because you didn't have your act together? Have you watched in despair as someone else ran through a door that you failed to see was open? Learn from those experiences, and buck up, mate! Walter Chrysler, founder of the Chrysler automotive company, once said that the reason so many people never get anywhere in life is that when opportunity knocks, they are out in the backyard looking for four-leaf clovers. Today I see people buying lottery tickets instead of investing in their futures. Invest in your future by preparing with hard work, dedicate yourself to your goals, and then watch for the right time to make the leap.
If you feel you never get a shot, maybe it's because you aren't locked, loaded, and ready to fire. You are responsible for your own success. Take on that responsibility by preparing yourself to do your best. When you get to the right place, the breaks will come. If you have a chip on your shoulder, or you're hosting a pity party, don't expect an invitation to the dance. Believe in yourself (have I mentioned this already?). Believe in the possibilities for your life. Believe in your value on this planet. If you don't feel worthy of wings, you'll never get off the ground.
Break a sweat. Get your hands dirty. Hit the books. Thomas Edison said opportunities are often missed because they are dressed in overalls and look like work. Are you ready to do whatever it takes?
I have to confess that when the Weigels first contacted me, I wasn't paying attention. Poor Kyle was so excited for me. He tried to tell me about his friends the filmmakers and the project they had for me. "I have some friends who have a movie idea for you—" was all he had a chance to say before I cut him off.
"Kyle, I'm too busy to talk to your friends right now," I said crankily.
I'd been traveling a great deal and was edgy and tired. Oddly enough, I'd recently been burned by another movie proposition. After hearing just a basic outline of it (a feature-length film!), I'd been excited about it for months. Then they sent me the script. It turned out, the producers wanted me to portray a foul-mouthed, tobacco-chewing character who spends most of the movie getting lugged around in a potato sack slung over someone's back.
That was not the sort of role I wanted to begin my movie career, or end it. So I said no. Not every chance is worth taking. You have to be true to your values, incorporating them into your long-term goals. What mark do you wish to make? How do you want to be remembered? I didn't want my grandchildren to one day discover a DVD of a movie in which Grandpa Nick curses, drools tobacco juice down his chin, and lives like a degenerate. So I said thanks but no thanks to that first movie offer.
I loved the idea of making a movie, but I wasn't willing to abandon my values to do it. You may have to make a similar decision. Stay strong. Stick with your principles, but don't make the mistake I made: when I closed that first door, I also closed my mind.
That's why I shot down good old Kyle without a second thought when he cheerfully brought the Weigels' film project to me. I didn't see the future because I was looking in the rearview mirror. Big mistake.
Fortunately, the Weigels were not easily discouraged. They asked another friend to contact my media director. He read their screenplay, loved it, and brought it to me. Upon reading it, I realized Kyle deserved an apology. The Weigels' screenplay was about hope and redemption, subjects close to my heart.
And who better to star in a film short than me? Especially since the character they'd created for me was "Will the Limbless Man." As the movie begins, he is a snarly and depressed "freak" in a ragtag circus sideshow. Then, thanks to the kindness of others, Will is invited to join a far more benevolent circus troupe, where he becomes the star of a thrilling high-pe act.
I realized I'd better get off my "buts" and kick into action. I thanked Kyle and asked him to set up a meeting with the Weigels. Great events quickly unfolded. We met. We bonded. And I signed on the dotted line. My enthusiasm grew when I learned that a number of much more experienced actors already had agreed to take roles in the film.
This was a low-budget, fast-moving project, so I only had to clear a week's time on my schedule to complete my scenes. You will have to check the reviews to decide whether I have a future in show business, but The Butterfly Circus won the $100,000 grand prize at the Doorpost Film Project, which supports filmmakers who make hopeful films. Our little movie (which you can find at http://www. thedoorpost.com) was chosen over one hundred other short films featuring similar themes. The Doorpost grand prize brought it a lot of attention, and the Weigels are considering turning it into a full-length feature.
I just may pe into that project too. After all, not many actors can play the role of a limbless man who pes, swims, and pulls off the perfect Australian accent!
LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION!
To pursue your dreams you have to take action. Move it or lose it. Act or be acted upon. If you don't have what you want, consider creating what you want. God will light the path. Your chance of a lifetime, the door to your dreams is open. Your path to a purpose may present itself at any moment. Be ready for it. Do all you need to do. Learn all you need to know. If no one comes knocking, beat down a few doors. One day you'll step into the life you desire.
Be willing to put yourself out there, to embrace the moment. Earlier in my career, before I got back pain, I offered after each speech to give a hug to everyone who wanted one. To my amazement and gratitude, many lined up to share a word and a little squeeze. I was amazed because every person I met in those sessions had something unique to offer, a gift that I could take away. You need to feel the same way about opportunities. Even those that may not seem golden at first may shine once you've stepped up.
MAKE A BREAK
Even after you've built a powerful purpose and have developed huge reservoirs of hope, faith, self-esteem, positive attitudes, courage, resilience, adaptability, and good relationships, you can't just sit around and wait for a break. You have to seize upon every thread and weave a rope you can climb. Sometimes you'll even find that the boulder that fell and blocked your path left an opening that takes you to a higher place. But you have to have the courage and the determination to make the ascent.
One of our mottos at Life Without Limbs is "Another day, another opportunity." We don't simply have our slogan framed on a wall—we try to live it every day. Dr. Cara Barker, a psychologist and leadership coach, picked up on this when she wrote in a Huffington Post blog: "Nick Vujicic demonstrates that it's possible to awaken the heart, giving inspiration to others through a situation that nearly everyone on this Earth would find debilitating. A hero, Vujicic finds opportunity where most would find a dead end."
I'm humbled by her words. Growing up, it was often difficult for me to ever imagine myself being called a hero or an inspiration to anyone. I realized as a child that being angry about what I didn't have or frustrated about what I couldn't do only pushed people away from me, but when I looked for opportunities to serve others, they were drawn to me. I've learned not to wait around but to push ahead and make my own breaks because one always seems to lead to another. Every time I give a speech, attend an event, or visit a new part of the world, I meet people, learn about new organizations, and gather information that opens new opportunities down the road.
BLESSINGS IN DISGUISE
Dr. Barker correctly notes that once I switched my focus from my physical challenges to the blessings they presented, my life changed dramatically for the better. You can do the same. If I can recognize that the body God gave me is in many ways a great and wondrous gift, can you acknowledge that your own blessings may also be in disguise, perhaps even dwelling within an aspect of yourself that you see as your greatest weakness?
It's all about perspective. There is no hiding from life. You will take some hits. Unless you are blasted so hard you go into a coma, you will become frustrated, angry, and sad: Been there, done that. Still, I urge you to reject despair and bitterness. You can be buried by a giant wave, or you can ride it into shore. In the same way, challenging events in your life can push you down or lift you up. If you can breathe, be grateful. Use that gratitude to rise above depression and bitterness. Take one step, then another, build momentum, and create a life you love.
My physical handicap forced me to be bold and to speak to adults and other kids and to interact. And because of it I focused on my strengths in mathematics, so I always had a fallback profession if my speaking didn't work out. I've often thought that even some of the heartbreak I've endured because of my disability has benefited me by making me more compassionate toward others. In the same way, the failures I've experienced have made me much more appreciative of my successes and much more sympathetic to others who struggle and fail.
TAKING MEASURE
Not all opportunities are equal. At the beginning of this chapter, I wrote about embracing my first movie role, after turning down that earlier offer.
Now if you watch The Butterfly Circus, you will see that Will, my character, at the beginning of the movie isn't exactly an inspiring bloke. In fact, he's a bit repulsive because of the bitterness and despair he harbors in his heart. But I accepted this role because Will undergoes a transformation and overcomes his misery and resentment. Like a prickly caterpillar who transforms into a soaring butterfly, Will slowly sheds his suspicions and distrust and becomes a redeemed, loving, and inspiring person.
That's how I want to be known on this planet. How do you want to be known? In earlier chapters, we looked at the importance of having a purpose. When offers and breaks come your way, or when you create them for yourself, you must always ask yourself, Does this match up with my purpose and my values?
What qualifies as a good opportunity? Anything that takes you another step closer to your dream. There are other types, of course. Perhaps your friends invited you to go out and get wasted last night. Or maybe you played video games instead of preparing for a meeting at work or reading a book to sharpen your skills. The choices you make determine the quality of the life you lead.
Be thoughtful. Develop high standards and strict criteria for evaluating how you invest your time and energy. Base your choices not on what feels good in the moment but on what best serves your ultimate goals. Measure them according to your values and principles. I use the Grandpa Nick rule: Will my grandkids be proud of this decision, or will they think their grandpappy was senile before his time?
If you need to create a disciplined, formal process for assessing opportunities, sit down at your computer or with a pen and paper and create an Assessment Worksheet. For every opportunity that comes your way, write down the pros and cons and evaluate how each measures up to the values, principles, and goals you've chosen for your life. Then try to envision what will happen if you walk through the door, and what will happen if you close it instead.
If you still have trouble making a decision, take your worksheet to a trusted mentor, or a friend who believes in you and wants you to succeed. Talk through the pros and cons with them, and listen to their evaluation. Be open-minded, but also know that the responsibility is all yours. It's your life. You will reap the rewards or pay the price for your own decisions, so choose wisely.
ARE YOU READY?
Timing is another consideration when making these assessments. Sometimes, especially when you are young, tempting offers present themselves, but the timing may be off. You don't want to accept a job that you aren't qualified for or prepared to master, just as you shouldn't rush off on a luxury vacation you can't afford. The cost is too high. It will take you too long to recover.
One of the biggest mistakes I made early in my public speaking career was accepting an invitation to address a large audience before I'd really prepared for such a thing. It wasn't that I had nothing to say, I just hadn't organized my material or honed my presentation. As a result, I lacked the self-confidence to pull it off.
I stuttered and stammered through that speech. People were kind to me, but I had blown it. But I learned from the experience, recovered, and realized that I should seize only those moments that I am fully prepared to handle. That's not to say that you shouldn't jump on an offer or an option that forces you to stretch and grow. Sometimes we're more prepared than we realize, so God gives us a nudge that allows us to rise to the occasion and take a giant step toward our dreams. American Idol, the hit television show, is built on that concept. In each episode, many of the young contestants crack under the pressure, or realize that they simply aren't ready for stardom. But now and then a raw talent emerges and blossoms under the intense pressure. A select few, notably Carrie Under-wood, Jennifer Hudson, Chris Daugherty, and Kelly Clarkson, have launched wonderful careers because they stretched, grew, and kept rising.
You need to weigh your options and carefully consider which stepping-stones will lead you to your goals, and which might cause you to slip and fall. Like me and the first movie role I was offered, you will come across opportunities that would serve a short-term goal but don't match up to your long-term objectives. Your decisions today will follow you into tomorrow. Often young people jump into relationships without considering whether the person is good for them over the long term. We're often reminded how security conscious we need to be when it comes to the Internet, whether it is our financial selves, our public reputation, or our private life that we need to protect. We're reminded that you've got to assume that everything you do—every photograph and video you appear in, every e-mail you send, every blog you write, every comment on your Web page—will show up in a search engine somewhere at some point and will exist on earth probably longer than you do. Just as you have to think carefully about how the things you post online without thinking can come back to haunt you, remember that the same is true in our lives when we evaluate opportunities that come our way. They have long-term consequences—which can help you or hurt you. The short-term benefits may look great, but what will the long-term repercussions be?
Step back and look at the big picture. Remember, you are often tested, but life itself is not a test. It's the real deal. The decisions you make every day impact the quality of your entire life. Assess carefully, then check your gut and your heart. If your gut tells you something's a bad idea, go with your gut. But if your heart tells you to leap at an opportunity—and it is aligned with your values and long-term goals—make the leap! There are still times when an offer arises that gives me goose bumps and I'm so excited that I want to just pe right in. But then I need to take a breath and pray for the wisdom to make the right decision.
THE RIGHT PLACE
If you have prepared yourself to the best of your ability but no doors have opened for you, then maybe you need to reposition yourself and your talents. If your dream is to be a world champion surfer, chances are Alaska won't offer many big waves, right? Sometimes you need to make a move to catch a break. I realized several years ago that if I wanted to develop a worldwide audience for my speaking career, I needed to move out of Australia and to the United States. I love Australia. Most of my family is still there. But Down Under was too remote a launching pad and didn't offer the options and the exposure that I've found in the United States.
Even after coming to the United States, I had to work to create my own breaks. One of the best moves I made was to network with others who shared my passion for speaking and inspiring others. Studies have shown that most people learn about job openings through their professional networks of friends and co-workers. As with most other types of opportunities, you hear about them on the grapevine long before other sources have the news. Whether you are looking for love, a job, an investment, a place to volunteer, or a venue to share your talents, you can make your own breaks by joining professional groups, local clubs, the Chamber of Commerce, or church, charitable, and service organizations. The Internet is tailor-made for making helpful connections, with social networking sites such as Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Plaxo. The wider your circle, the greater your chances for finding an open door to your dream.
You shouldn't limit yourself to just those inpiduals, organizations, and Web sites related to your field of interest. Everybody knows somebody who knows somebody. So seek out anyone who is passionate and committed to a dream, even if theirs is entirely different from yours. I love passionate people because they attract opportunities like mighty magnets.
On the other hand, if you are hanging with a crowd of folks who don't share your dreams, or your commitment to bettering your life, I'd advise you to find a new group of friends. Those who hang in bars, nightclubs, or video arcades rarely soar.
If you aren't attracting the sort of offers and options you aspire to, maybe you need to find higher ground through higher education. If you can't win acceptance to a college or university, work your way up through community college or a tech school. More scholarships and financial aid programs are available than you might imagine, so don't let the costs discourage you. If you've already earned a degree, you may want to upgrade to a master's or doctorate program, or join professional organizations, online communities, or Internet forums and chat rooms for people in your field. If the breaks aren't coming your way, then you need to get to the place where they can find you, or you can find them.
OPPORTUNE TIME
Albert Einstein said that in the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity. The recent recession has left millions of people unemployed. Countless others have lost their homes and their savings. What good can come of hard times?
Among the major brand companies that started up during recessions and depressions are Hewlett Packard, Wrigley, UPS, Microsoft, Symantec, Toys "R" Us, Zippo, and Domino's Pizza. The founders of these companies were looking for new and better ways to serve customers because previous models had failed during downturns. They seized the moment to create their own vision for doing business.
Without a doubt, the recession of 2006–9 had a profound and lingering impact that hurt many, many families and businesses. But many of the people cast out by corporations and longtime employers responded by starting their own businesses, going back to school for advanced degrees, or finally pursuing their passion in life, whether it was opening a bakery, starting a gardening service, forming a band, or writing a book.
Among those laid off or terminated in the recession were thousands and thousands of journalists. The downturn hit their industry especially hard because it occurred just as newspapers around the world were losing their lucrative classified ad business to online services like craigslist. It's been interesting to see how former journalists, who pride themselves on their resourcefulness and creativity, have responded. Several I know have launched new careers in public relations, nonprofit ventures, and Web-based media and blogs. One of my favorites is the former editor who left his shrinking California newspaper and became vice president of a booming crisis-management company that crafts "bankruptcy communications" for other businesses in decline. This is the Taking Lemons and Making Lemonade philosophy, which is really all about shifting your focus from moaning about the problem to finding a creative solution. You have to be flexible, determined, and ready to turn a potentially negative situation into a positive situation. One of the big American retail chains teaches its sales staff to view customer complaints as invitations for building better relationships with store patrons.
It's a matter of reframing. I do it whenever my schedule hits a snag by reminding myself that "God does not waste His time, so He doesn't waste mine either." In other words, it all works out for the good. I truly believe that, and you should too. When you buy into that philosophy, stand back. I've seen it proven true time and time again.
ON THE CLOCK
A few years ago I was flying with my caregiver across the country. At one airport our flight was delayed (no surprise), and when we finally were on the plane and taxiing from the departure gate, I looked out the window and saw smoke coming from the engine.
A fire truck came roaring up. The firefighters jumped out and sprayed foam on the engine to put out the blaze. Due to a small fire in the engine, the passengers were told, we will be conducting an emergency evacuation of this plane.
Well, all right, I thought. Fire in the engine was not good, but being on the ground when the "small fire" broke out was a plus. When it was announced that our flight would be delayed another two hours, many of my fellow passengers complained loudly and bitterly. I was irritated but glad we had been spared a possible mid-flight emergency, or so I told myself.
Still, I struggled a bit to remain positive since we were on a tight schedule. Remember, God doesn't waste time, I told myself. Then came yet another announcement: They'd lined up another plane at another gate to take us immediately. Good news!
We hurried to the new departure gate, boarded yet another plane, and settled in for the flight. I was relieved until I noticed that the woman sitting next to me was quietly weeping.
"Is there something I can do?" I asked.
She explained that she was flying to visit her fi fteen-year-old daughter, who was in danger of dying after a routine surgery had gone terribly wrong. I did my best to comfort the mother. We talked for nearly the entire flight. I even drew a smile from her after she told me she was nervous about flying.
"You can hold my hand if you like," I teased.
When we landed at our destination, the mother thanked me for comforting her. I told her I was grateful that I'd ended up seated next to her on the plane after so many delays and gate changes.
God had not wasted my time that day. He knew what He was doing. He put me next to that woman to help her with her fears and grief. The more I thought about that day, the more grateful I was for the chance to offer this woman a sympathetic ear.
CREATIVE VISION
A lost loved one, a broken relationship, a financial setback, or an illness can break you if you let grief and despair overtake you. One way to fight through those challenges is to stay alert for what rises up even when life seems to be taking you down.
I met the photographer Glennis Siverson on the set of The Butterfly Circus. Though she lives in Orlando, Glennis had come to California to serve as the set photographer at the invitation of the directors and her friends the Weigels. Glennis is an award-winning photographer whose work is commissioned by magazines, corporations, newspapers, and Web sites. She also does portrait and nature photography. She loves photography. It is her passion.
But for more than twenty years, Glennis worked in the human resources field for big companies. She lost her "safe and secure" job in the recession. Glennis took that kick in the pants and used the forward momentum to pursue her passion. She became a full-time photographer.
"I decided it was now or never!" she said.
Great story, right? Glennis is a real-life example of someone who took a potentially negative event and used it as an opportunity to create an even better life.
Terrifi c! Wonderful!
But there's more. You see, Glennis, the award-winning photographer, can hardly see. She is legally blind.
"Ever since I was a child I have had poor eyesight," she said. "I got glasses at age five and my vision kept getting worse. Then around 1995 I was diagnosed with corneal disease. The cornea is misshapen and degenerates. It got to the point that I couldn't see out of my left eye. Since I had extremely severe nearsightedness, it was past the threshold to get Lasik surgery. My only option was a cornea transplant."
In 2004 Glennis underwent that surgery. Her doctor had told her that it would correct the vision in her left eye to 20/40 without glasses or contacts. "But everything that could go wrong pretty much did—short of losing my eye," she said. "The operation made my vision worse. I also got glaucoma as a result. My vision worsened in my left eye, and then, unrelated to the operation, I had a hemorrhage on the retina of my right eye. So I have a blind spot on it."
Laid off from her job of twenty years, and all but blinded by failed surgery and a hemorrhaged retina, Glennis could not be blamed for despairing and giving up. You might expect her to grow bitter and angry.
Instead, she was grateful to soar higher and farther. "I don't think of myself as disabled. I think of myself as enabled, because being nearly blind has made me a better photographer," she said.
She can no longer see fine details, but instead of feeling deprived, she is grateful that she is free not to obsess about the little things anymore.
"Prior to losing most of my eyesight, if I was doing portrait photography, I was focused on every strand of hair and every angle of the person's body. My work looked stiff because I was so focused on composition. But now my approach is pretty much a gut reaction. I feel it. I see it, and I shoot it. My work is more instinctual, and I interact with people and surroundings much more.
Glennis said her photographs now are flawed but are more artful, more compelling. "One gal actually cried when she saw my images of her because she felt I'd captured her so well," she said. "I had never moved anyone emotionally before."
Since she lost much of her eyesight, Glennis has won ten international awards for her portrait and landscape photography.
One of her photos was selected from sixteen thousand entries for an exhibition of just 111 works. She's had photos selected for four exhibitions at the Center for Fine Art Photography in Fort Collins, Colorado.
Her blindness would never have allowed Glennis to continue her job in human resources, but many great artists such as Monet and Beethoven thrived despite disabilities because they used them as opportunities to explore their art in new and fresh ways. Grateful, Glennis told me that her favorite Bible verse is now "We live by faith, not by sight."
"That literally is my life now. I've had to make adjustments, sure. I worry about being totally blind. It's been very, very scary. There is no manual for this."
She is on a new path, but instead of seeing it as a disruption in her life, she views it as a gift. "I'd been very controlling before. Now I try to live day to day and enjoy each moment," she said. "I also try to be grateful that I have a roof over my head and I'm alive and the sun is shining and I don't worry about tomorrow because we never know what tomorrow will bring."
Glennis is a great lady, who embraces opportunity, don't you agree? She inspires me, and I hope she inspires you to look for ways to advance your dreams, choose them wisely, and then act upon them when your heart says "go."